“On the mountains of truth you can never climb in vain; either you will reach a point higher up today, or you will be training so that you will be able to climb higher tomorrow” - Nietzsche
Last academic period didn’t go easy on me. Or more accurately, I didn’t go easy on myself. I always aim to challenge myself, and with all the things that I had to do outside of studying I found myself struggling quite a bit more than previous periods. This, i believe, is a good thing, as it means that I am slowly approaching my limit and finding new ways to challenge myself.
But of course, this does leave a certain unease: “may the next challenge be my breaking point?” “Will I rise up to the challenge once again, or was last time’s succes a mere fluke?” “Will I be able to face the next mountain on my path?”.
This next metaphorical mountain is the course “Topology and geometry”, a course that has been hyped up for its difficulty in the mathematics curriculum. Now, although I understood the fundamentals of topology last period, topological proof writing is rather challenging, and this course will be a huge challenge for me. At first, leading up to the start of the new period, this left me anxious. I must, however, remind myself of my ultimate goal: “intellectual enlightenment”.
There are things that I find important to remember whenever I encounter such endeavors. Most importantly, I must remember that there exist no stakes in the greater scheme of existence, and that both failure and succes are fleating. The only thing that remains at the end is this life as I have lived it, and I alone can decide what influences this life. Let it then be the doing and not the achieving that engraves me. Remembering this helps me hold onto my motivations and courage.
There is no need to fear the great heights of the mountains we climb, for they only exalt us. But in rising higher, look out for gravity, a jealous force determined to keep us down down down like its own spirit. We find this gravity to be an external force, but enough external force creates internal force. Aim then to free ourself from as much gravity as possible when climbing mountains, lest it keep us tethered to the ground. In climbing, it is equally important to hone your strength as it is to weaken your gravity.
Fear of heights is a product of gravity, not of heights. But remember that gravity is nothing more than the influence of … the masses!